Tired of every day been a fight. Losing sight of what I'm even fighting for. Im really starting to believe my thoughts that say i can't beat this pain or this loneliness or hopelessness. I've been fighting this mental illness for 6 years now and so far this year has been the hardest and most painful so why keep fighting if its not getting better? If there's no reward or no guarantee of success what's the motivation to keep going?
4 Hearts
Hi Elisabeth56, Life is a 'Fight'... I can understand and relate to what you are saying and feeling... When we are struggling with any Mental Illness it is a very lonely and 'insular' place to be. I know this to, only too well as, I've been trying relentlessly, since I was 7 yrs old... This was when my life changed for me and since then, I have lost sight, many times of what it is I'm fighting for. My body is scared visibly and invisibly by the effect, my Mental Health Illness has had and still does have on me....When I have asked others, what you are asking now, they have said, the 'Reward' is 'Life'... To me though, as you expressed, if my 'Life' is so emotional/ painfull/ distressing/ chaotic and more for me, why or what is the point of the reward? I know their is no guarantee's in 'Life' but, would it be so bad, if sometimes, we got a 'Freakin Break'... I'm here if you would like to talk or PM me. I really do get your post and it is, how I feel 'Everyday' of my life... Sent with love, Trish x
2 Hearts
Hang in there. We just feel emotions stronger than other people, which can be extremely hard, but its also a gift. Keep that chin up.