Trigger warning. This is hard for me to admit. I'm having ba

Trigger warning. This is hard for me to admit. I'm having bad thoughts. Thoughts of swallowing all of my pills at once. Please help.

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I don't really know why. I've been depressed about the miscarriage again. And when I'm feeling something negative everything negative makes an appearance in my thoughts. All the old stuff with my brother. The fact that I can't seem to find work. I just don't see it getting better. I don't want to do this anymore.

I'm trying so hard not to give up, my parents have been through enough.

Maybe it just doesn't matter

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@RollerCoasterLady It does matter, and you do matter. Sorry no one has responded to you. How are you feeling now?

I guess everyone has their own things to deal with tonight.

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@RollerCoasterLady I’m sorry you are going through all this. What particularly has you down tonight? Something new or is it the same old, same old?

@ColaWars Some of the same old same old. Mostly the miscarriage. I've always wanted to be a mom. I would have been almost 8 months pregnant by now. It feels like God has found me unworthy or unfit. And I feel guilt for killing my child. I was warned not to get pregnant on the pills I take for bi-polar disorder and I just wasn't careful enough. I've stopped crying at least.

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@RollerCoasterLady First of all, you did not “kill” your child. Sometimes God takes back little souls who are better suited to be guardian angels from up above than regular angels on the earth. Don’t feel guilty, you didn’t do anything wrong

From Mood Disorders to Bipolar Disorder