Why is it that i allow what other people do, affect how i feel or how i act? if i think i should be in control of that person, and they do something without asking, i get pissed off. I have a completely different attitude. Why does it really matter to me what someone else does? They have a right to do, just as i expect to be able to do. i don't understand why i feel like i must control people in this way. Granted, the person spoke of has lied to me on several occassions. i feel if he is out of my sight, he's doing something he shouldn't be doing. Even though i know, i should be done with this relationship if the trust is broken, but now is not a good time. My health and the economy has us together. Plus, with all my past abusie relationships, i'm really comfortable with him even though he's lied to me. I feel so safe in his arms, even if i may not be, it FEELs that way. That's important when you haven't had that much. How do i stop myself from driving him crazy and away from me, or is it too late?
Trust needs to be earned, but when that special someone has broken it you suffer a broken and shattered heart. You don't know what to believe anymore and your trust issues begin. "Fear" has crept in and is playing with your mind. Your relationship becomes a "you can't live with or without him" for fear that there will never be another love like his. The first step to opening up your heart to trust again is to "forgive" I didn't say forget. Forgiveness relieves you of the pressure of carrying that burden. From here it is totally your decision to choose what is best for "YOU"...Rise above the fear of trusting again. Don't let anybody tell you that your not strong enough. You have to tap into that strengh an allow it to take you to a better peace of mind. Please always take care of yourself first so that you can be strong enough to walk this thru with a clear mind.........need to walk out the fear that he put in you. Take Care.
Wow, I feel exactly the same way with the relationship Im in and this isn't the first time either.
Usually with my gf I feel I need to know where she is and what she's doing all the time. It's my fear of losing her, I believe that I love her and that I need her, it's likethe world would collapse without her and as afinedezine said, it's also that 'i'll never meet anyone better' low self-esteem which affects it too. Sometimes I'm so afraid of losing her, but I understand that I can not control her, basically everything you said. I love her very much but feel like she has total control of me, because I am emotionally fragile and quite vulnerable to attacks from her or the threat of losing her.I don't have any advice, just reassurance that you're not alone.
From Mood Disorders to Bipolar Disorder