Why do I become shy around guy I like?

Why is it that I can talk to just about anyone, anywhere, anytime, but the moment I get around a guy that I like...I become this shy little school girl. It's like this whole other persona come through and out of nowhere. And, because I do so, then friends say that I give off a very uninterested vibe.

My friend invited me to an event last night and she introduced me to such a great guy. He gave me a lot of attention and at one point when I walked away, he came right over to me. I found other distractions and other people that I needed to say hello to in order to walk away. Why do I become this silly little school girl? It's either that or I become scared so it's easier to run. I am really trying to self analyze here because I feel like I am sabotaging myself with guys who I meet and like.

I guess the first step is self realization, but how do I get over doing this?

Thank you!

I think we all fall victim to that when we have a crush. I try really hard to remind myself it's all in my head and figure out a way to play the "friend card" where you are your absolute best self in front of anyone. Confidence is really attractive to everyone. I know you can't help it, but maybe you should remind yourself that nothing is a big deal, and to just relax. I know it's easier said than done but I really know how you feel. I've been there, it's so annoying and hard to snap out of when you're in the moment. But be sure of yourself and don't worry about people judging you. Let me know how it goes.

xo, July

The friend approach is a brilliant suggestion July! Thank you so much. I think that if I look at a guy I have a crush on as a friend, then it will be so much easier to be my true self around him. And, you are so right, confidence is very attractive to men. My male friends have all told me that, so I have to hold my head up high, feel good about myself and talk to him as I would to any other guy.

Yes, however it is you act around your closest guy friends, try emulating that towards any men you have a crush on. Nobody wants to be around an intimidating gal. Although you probably aren’t, being shy exudes qualities we don’t necessarily possess. Just keep those things in mind!

Thank you! I'm definitely not a shy gal, so it's strange for my friends to see me become the shy girl when I like a guy. I have to let that go. And, you're right about the intimidation factor; I was always told that I'm intimidating to me....so I have to find the happy medium and your suggestion is perfect.

i am the same way...you feel awkward and shy. I like July's suggestion too! i will keep that in mind :)

Hey Puppy,
I think it's all about changing the habits and when you feel yourself wanting to walk away say to yourself no, I'll stay and do the whole flirty eye contact thing:)

Ii think it's great that you are doing a self analysis. It really does help to realise what we do really well and poorly.

Keep up the good work and there is a great man waiting for you hun, I am so sure.
So you just keep being you and you'll do great.

Love to you hun
Moongal xxx

Sorry haven't been great support my computer has a virus and I had to hand it in.

But I'm getting it back soon.

If you see your computer is being attacked and then a software called antimal doctor offering anti-viral software, that is the virus...they send in the virus and then want to sell you this sofware to get your credit card details.

welcome back moongal!

Guys really do like to see confidant woman when they are talking to them. We also like to see a HINT of that silly school girl too. It is the tip off that you might like us.

However, when you walk away from a guy multiple times without any signs of interest, we see that as a clear sign of rejection. I am not saying that is what you did. I'm not even implying that you didn't let him know somehow that you were interested.

Also, if you play the friend card, please don't play that hand with an absolute poker face. It does work but men can be absolutely clueless when you do that.

yes on the friend card factor but name one guy friend of yours that wouldn’t sleep with you given the chance. I can’t name any, lol. They’re so complex yet so easy sometimes.

xo, July

LuvsHeadMeds, thank you so much for your brilliant insight. Thank you for being here and guiding us through this fun singles process. I have great male friends and I am somehow still clueless when it comes to dating. When it comes to business, I have all the confidence in the world, but when it comes to dating...I'm just clueless. I am really trying to learn and grow and become a better dater.

If guys like the silly school girl...I am good to go ;-)