Why does it still hurt when it's wrong?

Why is it that when you end a relationship that you knew was wrong, it still hurts so much? The tears seem endless and the heart pain is harsh.

I ended a relationship that was wrong from the onset but I powered through it and really tried to make it work. The worst happened when I found out that he was continually online dating while we were together. It only lasted for 5 months, but I was very open and honest about where I am in my life and that's a serious place and I want to be with someone where it can lead to something solid.

Is it ok to be dating around 5 months into a relationship? Is it ok to only call someone once per week and see them once per week or even once every three weeks? Call me crazy, but that seems so wrong to me. Maybe it's because I'm old fashioned.

But, the thought of getting back out there again is pretty tough, though I know that I have to do it. Any advice on how to move on happily and positively?


No its not ok to be dating around after 5 months. Only way is if that's what you guys have both decided. If you guys are friends and allowed to date whoever you want then it's ok to call or see each other once a week. Three weeks then it's a sign he isn't trying to make time for you in his schedule. No relationship should be like that. He should call once a day. The dating game has changed so much and sometimes people choose to make up there own rules as they go along. Maybe taking a fun class to meet singles. It's so hard to date these days. Online dating helps some people, but you can see if that may be something you may want to try. My friend met her husband online and they have been married for 12yrs now. There are success in online dating. Good luck and take care.

Bluestar, you are so wonderful, thank you so much for all of your insight, advice and guidance, I truly appreciate your time so much. I totally agree with all of your thoughts; I am very traditional, thus continuing to date around as a relationship progresses is not ok. I thought that I would have to change my ways and values in order to date nowadays but I'm just not willing to do so. I know in my heart that I did everything right, I gave it a try and I was open and honest. As well, I never even looked at another guy, let alone dated one. I can lay my head on my pillow at night with a clean conscious, and I guess that's all that matters.

I've heard so many online dating success stories as of late, so I think that I will give it a try. Thank you so much again! You are the best!

Sure no problem. Never change because there will be the right man for you. I believe there is someone at there for everyone. The right man would never ask you to change he will love you for being you. Best wishes ;)

Thank you so much Bluestar! I believe the same, there is most definitely someone out there for all of us. And, honestly with each day that passes, it gets easier and easier and I am moving out and away from the hurt towards the feeling of happiness and promise of a wonderfully loving relationship.

My lady.. it hurts because you are one of those rare women in this world who is able to love.. we dont take things for granted.. we see ourselves in the face of another and when we dont find it its wrong.. love is completing the other person as much as completing ourselves. You are able to love.. and you are understanding what love is.. be proud of this. My thanks for women in this world like you.

Ok.. gotta say one more thing.. this dateing game isnt a game.. or Im out... dateing is to find yourself and help another to find his/her self. I am to old to play games.. we have a life.. when they add to ours and we add to theres.. thats what I am hunting for.. lol.. a package deal.. the last lady I dated told her about my sons and she told me about hers.. we talked of old redneck hippy things.. her dad. .my dad.. hunting with an old 22 when I was 10yo.. lost her.. a wonderful lady. be yourself.. Im just an old redneck hippy. be yourself.. upfront.. If love is just a game Im not playing. You dont do it either.. be yourself because for the right one (havent found it myself yet).. but for the right one.. its his fantisy come true.

Wow Ststephenmc, you have no idea how much your words affected me and put the biggest smile on my face and brought tears of joy to my face. I needed to read your words more than ever now because I was feeling quite sad about the situation. I am ready to find love and I know that the right person will appreciate me for me. Just like I know that the right woman will appreciate you for you.

You are an amazing man with so much to give...that I can tell from your incredibly compassionate and caring words. Thank you so much for that. I'm sending you tons of positive energy so that you and the right woman can find one another so very soon.

betwn u both u have covered all the high spots of dating.

great to see u both so positive and comfortable in your own skins

as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)

Thank you so much Domestic! Means the world to me, honestly. It helps to have your reaffirming words. Thank you for that.


i always tell it like i see it

as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)

You most definitely do Domestic and that's why I appreciate you so much. Thank you for being you.