So I've come to realize that I feel alone all the time because I basically think I'm a nobody and I have to be around me all the time. Who else feels this way? And here is my big question.... How do you improve your self esteem? I am codependant so I really do need to find my worth "within myself" but HOW?
as i've said, i'm there with you hun!!
how to find that worth? im not sure myself. but i do think we will have to face a lot of things we fear. and one of them certainly is accepting who we are, inside and out. again, how to do that? positive affirmations, challenging your core believes, mantras, listening to others, mindful practices. as you can see, im not sure myself. it won't be an easy journey, but can you imagine how great the outcome would be??? :-)
xxxxxx
yeah..im glad to see someone relates..please let me know anything inspirations or ideas or etc that come to mind on this subject. I'm not even the person that makes it known. I'm good at hiding it. I'm like content with myself to other people but not with myself. Does that make sense? Someone thinks I'm fat..well i dont care they are mean, but I AM FAT which means IM TIRED ALL THE TIME AND SORE AND LAZY AND BORING! Do you get what I mean??? Just let me know anything you come across that helps. i did not realize how low my self esteem was until recently. and how much it affects me
hon
the self esteem just seems to wither away over night u tend not to be good at something like sports and so u dont bother anymore u just assume that u are rubbish at it and so it all slips and slides untill suddenly its all gone, so what we need to do is reafirm what u are good at and im sure u are great at something so what is it?
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
i know what you mean maryrose, about seeming confident and self sure to others yet not actually feeling that way. other people would have no idea whatsoever how much i hate and despise myself!
as domestic says, i think one way to maybe bring some self esteem back is finding things you feel you're good at. even if it's just something basic like cleaning, walking the dog, being well organized etc. or of course hobbies.
so what do you think you're good at? or simply what do you enjoy doing?
xxx
I can definitely relate. I do not know how much it helps, but I would like to help as much as I can. I have been Bipolar since I was 16. I know loneliness and feeling hopelessness. My family would not accept that I needed help to control this disease, so it became much, much worse. I isolated my self for a very long time. When I was 21, my mother died from cancer and things really went down, as if they could go down any farther. I was married in March of 1991. It is a miracle my marriage has survived. I finally found a wonderful doctor who wants to help me. We found the right treatment for, and that gave me real hope for the very first time. I finally have full support from my husband, family, and friends. It is not gone by any means, but it can be controlled to live a much happier life.I hope you have a support system and you need to seek help on building your self esteem and learn how to love your self. I know all about self hatred. You need to see your doctor because it might be a medical condition as well. Never give up and never give up hope. I would not be here today if I had given up. Please contact me anytime, if you would like to.
I wonder if we actually polled people we thought had self esteem and asked them about themselves how they would feel? I second guess myself and dont have faith in myself and feel my self esteem is what has brought me to the positions I have experienced in my life. I realize though I want to be for myself what I tell other people. I remember i had a therapist who made me stand on a chair in a group therapy session and affirm "I am a beautiful, caring, loving, funny and independent woman" and i had to do it for weeks until I made them believe it. Act as if until you believe. affirm that you are. if there is something you dont like you may change it but only if you want and only if its not because your being mean to yourself... Im sorry i should say "I" for the "you" things i posted. The gift is you can move forward from this moment. "You cant drive forward while looking in the rearview mirror" I was told. And if you are having a hard time believing it right now. take our belief in you. :) you can borrow our belief till you get your own:) i see a beautiful woman with a beautiful smile and a good heart and mind. ((((hugs)))))
yearning
what a fantastic way to look at life and if u ask me what i see its a little old lady who is a bit dumpy but has clear eyes and a zest for life, i love the fact that im too old to care about a few wrinkles although the grey hair is a bit much
u are right when i was young it was fake it till u make it
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
Thanks guys. lots of wondeful words that i will take in deeply and ponder. I like to ponder =] I'm so overly tired tonight, not toooo much to respond to other than WELLL SAID LADIES! Thank you very much and you guys are really intelligent.
Have a good night and thank youu!! <3
yearning, welcome to the site and what incredible outlook and amazing advice!! thanks for the support and encouragement for all of us (and yourself!).
maryrose, hope oyu got some rest? how you doing?
love
maedi
I am doing pretty pretty goood today will be a day filled with errands and stuff to do. It's always Monday-Friday i feel the worse when I'm all alone for 8 hours because my husband works. Im like a different person....my problems get magnified. Hopefully this week will be filled with peace, joy, and a content heart.
hon
its always worst when u are alone the hours loom horrendously and u wonder what u are going to do to fill them how about joining somewhere just to get u out and about each day, a playgroup a dog rescue centre or mayb a driver taking others to docs appointments
im sure the week will be better or i will hope so
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
could you creat a daily or weekly schedule to plan activities as well as relaxation time? maybe do some charity work?
xxx
those seem like great ideas thanks guys i will look into that!