Why oh why did i do that

i must be a gluton for punishment. I just had to go on one of my friend's facebook page to see married guy's face. now i feel like crap!

what is wrong with me? why can't i just pretend he never existed??

Heather, don't be so hard on yourself. Do you know how many of us do this. It's hard not to look back on your last love and someone you had a deep connection with, especially when you haven't met someone who has surpassed those feelings. It's totally normal, just try to ease yourself off and away from doing things that remind you of him and tempt you to contact him. Remember, we are always here for you, so try to stop yourself and vent to us here before doing so. We'll get you through it.

thanks puppy!

i appreciate your being here :) I feel better now and i will not do that again knowing it will just hurt. i am better than that and have to stop living in the past and move on to the future :)

i am playing around with the thought of trying match.com

Just remember not to be hard on yourself over it. It's harder to move on and away from a situation when your constantly reminding yourself of the past. The less and less you look at pictures of him, the sooner you will get completely over him. I also think that it will help to start getting out there and meeting new people.

I'm so excited that you'll be trying Match. I have several friends dating successfully on Match. I really think it's a lot like traditional dating. You sometimes meet a few guys that don't work until you finally get to the right one. Let me know if you need any help or guidance. My friends have given me lots of tips.

Heather .... it's often nice to reminisce about how we felt or still feel for someone. I tend to find myself doing exactly what you did when I am sad.

I look at like this: I am just trying to relive how good that person made me feel or remember just how much fun I once had with someone. I see this as something very positive as it gives me hope for the future. It also helps to relieve my current state of mind too.

However, if you do something that you should not have, then it has become a negative thing.

As for match.com: Save your money. Try plentyoffish.com and/or okcupid.com they are both free. And, it really doesn't matter if you pay or don't pay to use a dating site. You will still run into the same people regardless.

The great thing about Internet dating is that you can interact with way many more people than you can anywhere else. Also, you can pick their mind before you even have to commit to a date.

Those are such great suggestions LuvsHeadMeds; haven't ever tried plentyoffish.com or okcupid.com. If I get back online, then I will try both. If I haven't already mentioned it, so fantastic having you and your fabulous male insight here. Thank you!

I have done it and feel the same way, i have found the less I look the better I feel. So now I do just as the others say. It works. Keep you chin high you are beautiful.

Listen Heather,
We all do the facebook stalking thing, let's be real here. It's normal. Some people are harder to get over than others, but I'm certain there will come a day when you'll wake up, and ask yourself, what the hell was I thinking? That moment will happen, it's just a matter of when. Don't force yourself to be so unnatural and forget him as if he never existed. I think trying to achieve that will only cause you to think about him more. Nobody is saying don't think about the guy, we're saying don't communicate with the guy. One thing at a time...

thanks to all of you for your help! i appreciate each and every post and your advice :)

Of course Heather, always here for you, anything that you need. Please keep sharing.