hello,
I am in such a state this morning...i slept later than usual and woke up crying my eyes out. i think i may have had a panic attack as well, i started sweating and started to feel sick.
I almost emailed the person that broke my heart just to talk to him. I don't think that would have been a good idea.
I don't know what to do! :(
Hey Heather,
Yeah you are right not to email the person. If they broke your heart, by keep them close, they are only reminding you of what happened. It's ok to be sad from a broken heart hun. And I know this sounds like tripe but time heals all, I know this because a few weeks back I was in the same situation....tired and wrecked and I just wanted to forget about it. My head new better but it was poor heart that had to take the pain.
So hun I would recommend you do something to take your mind off this person like take up an activity you haven't done in a while or start a new activity. Remember this guy was not good to you, and from your last post I gather is married, you have to let him go. 1. Because you know it is the right thing to do and 2. Because you know that you can't accept a guy who is only half in it, and why should you when you can get the real deal. So just keep fighting the good fight hun.
We are here whenever you want to talk about anything. Ok. So don't worry things will get better, and everyday this pain will ease.
Much love to you
Moongal x
hi moongal,
Thanks again for your words. i just feel like real crap right now....but i'm glad i found this group :)
i'm glad to know that i'm not alone in the whole single scene
Ah hun, of course you're not alone and i know that feeling and i really feel for you i do. but thing will get brighter and until then keep leaning on us for support and keeping talking it out.
Love to you
MG x
you are all so wonderful and sweet on here. thanks so much for all the support :)
Hi Heather, If the time is right for you to talk to him it will happen. If they broke your heart, then it may be good to do the out of site out of mind thing and not see them at least until you are feeling better. It is ok to cry. Crying helps. Please keep sharing with us. We are all here for you. ((((hugs))))
i am going to call my therapist tomorrow....i slept all day today. i took a xanax to calm down because i was getting an anxiety attack, sweating and feeling sick :(
I have a son who was falling apart over a woman who was no good for him. He was a mess for a while. Eventually he did get over her, but had to go through the pain that u are going through. U probably feel, peoplejust don’t know cause it aint them - You know how you feel about him and so on. But I’ve been there myself feelin insecure, lonely and so sick I couldn’t eat or sleep and just obsess over it. So hard to believe that u will be free from these bad feelings and someday u will see u can’t believe u wasted your time on him. My son is now engaged to a lawyer who he would of never met had the other women not of left him. He now says thank god she left me or I would of never been with my future wife. See how thankful now but swore it was the worst thing before. So even though it feels like hell, know its okay to feel this way and you will be okay and better days are coming - even though it don’t FEEL that way now. Therapist is a great idea and might help.
thanks poofy!
That does give me hope of better days :)
Oh and some more motherly advice. I would call people that were bad to me and dumped me out of desperation and it was a mistake. I felt worse that before I called. It lowered my self esteem even more and made me feel like a fool. My advice let him go no contact.
Write us on this support group to vent or talk. I just started doing the forum thing and I feel I help and others help me. For the most part, I think most people on these want to help and care.
Hey,
Ya they are great here for support. Thanks Poofy for the tale of your son. Gives me hope too. Looking forward to meeting a sweet, funny guy, who falls crazy mad in love with me....:)
Also heather my therapist told me to write letters to the person but don't send them, it's a form of therapy that actually writting your thoughts toward them on the piece of paper, after you can just dump it if you want, but just to get it out of your system, if could help you sum.
Just make sure not to bottle it up, I made that mistake for years and it's only now I am coming to realise that we all have the end of our rope and I was hanging by a thread.
You'll feel so much better soon. Sending you loads of warm hugs.
Love to you
MG x
thank you moongal!
I just may do that :) how did you get back on your feet? what was your first step to being happy again?
Well my first step, was saying - OK i have to stop dating and then acknowledging that I was really really hurting. I had gone through suffering torture from this person for two years and I just took it and smiled through it believing if I kept being nice, eventually things would be better....don't be fooled it NEVER gets better.
And I actually had to admit to myself that I did actually deeply deeply care for this person, I used to just laugh everything off and even deny my own feelings to myself.
So just letting myself hurt and feel that pain and anger was the first step to moving on. And it's a good thing, because once you get passed it, you let it go. It's been about 4 weeks since I last spoke with him, and now I don't think about him. i have no want to mail,text or hear a word that comes out of his liary mouth. My feelings are levelled at pretty much zero.
Now it may help that things ended ugly and sometimes a good slap does snap you out of these things fast. Now I'm just trying to work on putting me back together, because although my feelings for him are fairly minor, I feel I have to put myself back together again and get my own self esteem back before i go heading on dates again. Because i do want to meet someone good and in order for that to happen I have to be complete if you know what I mean?
Hope you are feeling better hun.
Love to you
Moongal x
i understand and appreciate what you're saying, but i don't feel better yet :(
its been a short time, roughly 2 weeks since i spoke to or saw him.
it just hurts unbelievably i can't stand it.
I know, it's bound down. I think heartache is one of the most powerful pains we experience in our lives. It can almost feel physical.
I remember there was a time when I wanted to be sick when I thought of what he had done and how much it broke me in two. That someone I cared for so much could care so little for me.
I'm unsure as to the situation between you and your ex but I have a feeling in your heart you know it is for the best, although I know that sentence brings you little comfort at present, you need to be loved completely, and you will find that. You just need to grieve the past in order to shed the wounds and move forward.
Have you thought of anything you'd like to do this week just for you? I plan to buy a book on the teachings of budism. Don't get me wrong i am not changing religion, but i do like the idea of their teachings of serenity and peace.
And I have vowed to exerise. Anything planned for yourself?
Love to you
Moongal x
i do a have a gym membership with dust on it. lol as far as anything else....i've been in my house so long i don't know what i want to do. it sounds kind of pathetic, but i go to work and come home.
That's not pathetic hun. That's what a lot of people do, work is pretty tiring. But maybe you should a little stroll in the evenings if you don't feel like the gym. It really is good to get out and clear your head and exercise does boost your energy levels.
It really does work too. And treat yourself, maybe do a facial or hair treatment, followed by pajamas and a hot choc before bed, it's like giving yourself a lovely hug. I love doing those things when I'm feeling blue, it's not a vast amount of money but it makes me feel really lovely.
There are so many things you can do for yourself. Just give yourself a small push to even start off with a small 20 minute walk in the evening.
You do deserve and will start to feel better soon, this is just rough part now but it does pass.
Love to you
MG x
thank you so much moongal....i will try that
Hi Heather, I am so sorry that you had such a tough morning, but I am hoping that you are feeling better by now. I am praying for you and sending you positive energy. I know that you will get through this period and come out on top. Time will most certainly heal all wounds, and each day will get better and better. As well, I think that seeing your therapist is a great idea, a good place to vent and be given professional guidance and advice.
We are here to support and help you in any way that we can. Please keep sharing. Wishing you all of the very best.
When my daughters (I have three) have broken up with their boyfriends or had their boyfriends break up with them, they got in touch with their friends and started hanging out with them more. My oldest daughter started going to the gym which she loves doing now. The main thing is having the courage and strength to pick up the pieces and live your life again which you may do this by taking teeny, tiny baby steps. You can do this one day at a time. With time, you will feel better. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and you will get there. Keep sharing with us. We are here for you as you can see. ((((hugs))))