Has anyone ever reached out to AP years later? Or thought about it? I learned no one can control us but the damage done yes my wife and I first and foremost need to deal but such intrusive thoughts of him still years later. Definitely better but still painful. Obviously as I told marriage therapist still many unresolved feelings and what happens when they are not dealt with to satisfaction between the couple? How do couples compromise when what one needs might in fact hurt the other like dealing complete wit this affair. Things are far better but not resolved do they ever?
I’ve never reached out. My situation, they had no idea about me and even if they did, he owed me loyalty, not the AP.
It may help you to write a letter to the AP and read it to your partner. Then, maybe, write a letter to your wife telling her all that you said here.
I have found writing helps me as I get to edit and stop when my emotions get too hot. It allows me to get all my thoughts out.
Best of luck to you.
@Gettingthere01thankyou for the words I did do the letter piece and not send