hi all...i am really lucky to find this group...people here are so nice....
my husband of 6yrs was my best friend...but we were in a sexless marriage from last 3 yrs...and the last yr i moved out(he asked for some space and he promised to return)...but i came to know he is having an affair from last 1.5 yrs...and he wants A divorce..i m hurt..
i ve been utterly faithful to him even in the sexless phase...my only joy was just to be with him...i took care of him...cooked him food...his favourites..bought him so many things he liked...he is obsessed about his career but he is jobless...i m very succesful...
i dont know where did i went wrong...why this happened to me ???
i feel what he did was wrong...and unfair..i didnt deserve this after all the efforts i made..
i feel very angry now...and really want a revenge...he cheated my trust..
my question is...will KARMA will take revenge? will he ever regret or realise?? will he be punished by bad karma...
i want a smooth divorce...but want time to punish him for wat he did to me..
will it happen?
is karma real?
Get a divorce and move on, allow karma to work her magic, you need to move forward and find some joy out there!
@CKBlossom u r sweet…i m scared u know…about my future…so u say karma is real?
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
I believe this. It gives me great hope. Just reading the Bible puts hope in my heart and good thoughts in my mind. Wishing you peace in this.
(There are lots of ways to volunteer and invest in others.)
@PennyRoy god has really funny way of showing that u know…
i too pray everyday…hope that everything will b good by time…dunno…
but looks like god has all best plans for my cheating husband…god he is so happy and i am so jealous
Hi Ria, sorry to hear about you. I know how it feels to be let down after investing so much of your time and effort into a relationship. Even I have been through a similar situation. I was married for 4 years and my ex wife had a previous relationship before marriage and I didn't know about all this. Mine was an arranged marriage and she was never fully committed to a relationship. First 2 years she didn't want to have a child, then it was that we need to buy a house first then we can try for a child. But later he on she cheated me with the money, she withdrew the money from the loan account and left house. Then within a month served me a separation notice from the lawyer. I had looked after so well and loved her very much, but I only got betrayal in the end. But yes, karma will get her one day. Yes, stay strong and move on with your life...
@Melvin1984 really sorry to hear that…its really painful…
so u divorced?
did u put a legal case against her?
Sounds like you are in a SEXLESS MARRIAGE - may I suggest going to the "I LIVE IN A SEXLESS MARRIAGE" Forum - serious amounts of excellent advice and support there - if interested google " ILIASM "
@ria5 I am separated for nearly 2 years now. Planning to file a divorce soon. I sold the house and divided the proceeds and bank accounts etc 50% settlement. Above this she stole money from the account as well. If I had gone to court I would have spent the court fees, lawyers fees etc. so my lawyer suggested to do a 50% settlement.
What about you Ria? Are you divorced?
@Mel2017 no i m separated for a year now…i want him to file the divorce…i cant take the pain of court and all… he wants it so let him do…i m not stopping him…y will i spend a single penny for this?
Alright Ria, read please. The first thing I will ask you is to forgive and forget. Forgive your husband for doing you wrong and forget about him regretting what he did or about revenge. If you are expecting him to feel bad about it you will be unhappy. When people expect things from other, even if it is an apology, people usually get hurt. Even more than you are right now. So what do I think you should do... Move on. Make some changes. Get even prettier than you are. Keep moving forward on your career. If he seems to do well without you, then feel happy for him. You will never know what goes inside his mind. But what you can control, is the outcome of your life. :D I am certain that you will get a decent man that will appreciate you and love you, but it will not happen until you love, appreciate and respect yourself. Forget about Karma. Or if God will punish him or not. God has his ways of telling us what we deserve and what not.
@JayCoast oh my god…ur every word is so right…
i m finding difficult to forgive him…i need to move on too…
I am currently paying for my 2nd divorce. Best money I ever spent!
He could be depressed, that's a common cause of sexless relationship. I don't think you should punish him I do think you should pick yourself up and take this time to enjoy YOU time. Work on yourself etc.
Oh, I can relate to your story on many levels. I realize that anger can take over and that's not a good thing. Your best revenge is in living a good life and taking care of yourself. My ex husband was so angry when I took control of my life and moved on. I learned so much from that experience. I came out of it a stronger, wiser and much happier individual. Am in another chapter of my life right now and that knowledge I gained will help me through this as well. Stay strong and move on.
evven if you somehow make him pay or if karma was real and he does pay, how truly good will you feel inside?
@dakiwi13 i know but i feel so betrayed…and it was so unfair too me
Please remember, revenge is a negative emotion. At this time in your life you have an opportunity to define yourself going forward. If you gravitate towards those negative emotions and actions/reactions you are only letting the negative into your life. This is not where you need to be, or where you need to take yourself.
I am still going through my divorce. For me, the turning point was January when I had reached the point that I was tired of feeling angry/down/hurting and I no longer wanted to feel that way. Fortunately a local counseling group (DivorceCare) was just starting up. This, and the Surviving Divorce podcast really helped me get though the bad times. I found that wanting or wishing ill for my spouse never affected her, but those emotions affected me. Once I realized that I CAN move on, and do it is such a was that I can look back later and feel proud, decent and honorable about how I handled myself my heart became much lighter, and the burden easier to bear.
What is important is how you will judge yourself when this is over. Will you be at peace with yourself because you know you did the right thing? Holding on to anger and resentment is like having a house full of old stuff - too much and it owns you rather than you owning it. George Carlin got that right!
@ProudDad_1 u r every word is right…
i m so glad for you
I believe the energy comes back to them My first husband abandoned me and my our two daughters. My heartbreak was so strong that he literally, 18 years later has a broken heart. It doesn't work well and he is expected to have a much shorter lifespan. He has lived in a campground in WA all these years to avoid child support. My second husband sexually abused my younger daughter and was caught trying to pick up a 13 yr old in NJ. He is now in prison, they are building a huge case against him and it is unlikely he will get out again.
Karma is meaner than I could ever be.