Hi guys. I am currently studying psychology and studying this "HOCD" stuff. I am a female that had it before, so if any of you have any questions let me know, I'm sure i can help you.
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hi,,, thank u ... just may be u know how to stop those electric responses on the penis when immediately same sex is coming to the brain?
@ah__94 and clearly all the hyper sexualizing with hocd is not really true feelings which leads to confusion, no?
Ok. How to stop the electric responses? Well, a quick question. Do you get this everytime you think about the same sex?
@D_D_M actually I never think about same sex. really want nothing to do with it. NO wishes, fantasies or love. Since my childhood I was ONLY attracted by woman. but once - 3 years ago it started with a very stupid case, when I asked myself and then all the fears and anxiety started, and then once it transformed in electric responses… you ask me “every time”… in my case, the though about same sex comes to my brain against my will, and sometimes it gives me spikes - electric response… but want to ask you: did you give me that question “every time”, that if I tell you - “yes”, you will tell me something I am most afraid of? and you will tell me that I am gay or bi? I repeat: I have all the symptoms of HOCD, and believe I have. I will not believe I am gay or bi, because I have and never had ANY wish of same sex… but the only problem I have (after beating anxiety) is that electricity, which I think also can be caused by EVERYTHING, which brain connects to SEX… the problem is, that when brain does it with same sex, you feel depression, because this case makes you feel most unhappy and depressed…
Ok. I'm sure that you are not gay. You are straight. Those electric responses are most of the time caused by anxiety. I've had them before when i had hocd. I'll explain. Every time these thoughts about the opposite sex get into your mind, you will start getting anxiety, anxiety causes an increase in blood pressure, which will provoke this "electric response" in the genital area. No, it doesn't mean that you are attracted to the same sex, like i said, it's caused by anxiety, and anxiety doesn't determine your sexual orientation, anxiety is a negative feelings, it can cause you unhappiness and depression like you said. You have to know that anxiety it's not reality. Who you are is what you enjoy doing, or what you enjoy thinking about, that's one person's reality. Happiness. These electric responses not only occur when thinking about sex, they can also occur whenever you are having anxiety. Another option can be that you are probably focusing too much on these thoughts that you end up getting this electric response. In the other hand, it's normal to think about same sex while having hocd. But one main reason why people can't get rid of it is that they try to avoid these thoughts, and that's the worst thing that you could you, because later on, they tend to come back even stronger. In order to stop this electric spike, you have to have discipline. Every time you get one of these thoughts, don't avoid them, just let them in and out like if it was part of you, like if the thought wasn't new anymore. People tend to say "just try not to think about" in reality it's more like "try not to give it importance". That's all you gotta do. Don't focus on them, don't avoid them, don't give them importance. Remember that it's all your mind, and you can control it. Good luck.
@D_D_M very much thanks for your really very nice answer… that was really very helpful, espacially this part: “Another option can be that you are probably focusing too much on these thoughts that you end up getting this electric response. In the other hand, it’s normal to think about same sex while having hocd. But one main reason why people can’t get rid of it is that they try to avoid these thoughts, and that’s the worst thing that you could you, because later on, they tend to come back even stronger.”
as I mentioned before, I somehow achieved to decrease anxiety, and feel that sometimes I no more feel anxiety, but anyway I have some symptoms (although really less than I had before when was too much nervous about my feelings). Or, may be, I still have the anxiety, which not so much attacks my heart or brain, but because of this “low” anxiety I still have those responses… for example, once of the last case: being with my friends, in a minute, occasionally and immediately an idea came to my brain: “what if I am opposite person of my friend, and love him”… and this idea made some genital electricity… and in a minute, when I have NO explanation how to stop that, I fall in a HUGE depression… because after all, after all fighting, visiting psychologists, getting educated in it, and EVERY day and every minute fighting during 3 years!!! I still have those symptoms and can not stop them… but anyway, I very much agree and believe what you wrote… the only doubt, which I have: what if I achieve not to have anxiety and not to give them importance, will not focus on them, will not avoid them, and after all these hard work, these genital responses still will be LIVE! because, I somehow can not understand: nudity is very much connected to sexuality and sexual feelings, and how I can not stop those responses, when this is very much connected with sexual feelings and which are very NATURAL? please response and very much thanks to you
Ok, that is not going to happen, believe me, I'm telling you, once you are done with hocd, those electric response won't happen again and it will get back to normal, back to who you used to be, back to being happy. Believe me. You just gotta believe that you can do it. Every Second it's a chance to get rid of it.
Those electric responses won't happen again because you are completely straight and the only reason why you are getting these electric responses is because you have hocd. No other explanation.
@D_D_M very very very much thanks to you! you nice person, attentive and good! many thanks I wish you happiness in your life!
Same for you. Glad i could help you. Don't forget to ask me anything if you have any question, I'm here to help. :)
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@D_D_M I believe I'm suffering from hocd and I need someone to talk to who understands it... I'm confused and have questions
Sure, ask me whatever you want.
OK, so this is a long story so I'm gonna try my best to shorten it up. From the time when I was 9-13 my ex step brother and I had sex a few times a weekend (I'm a guy btw). At the time, i was too little to really understand what was going on but I just let it happen. I've always been attracted to girls and always been straight. Back in August or so I was thinking about past relationships and why I haven't been in one in a while and then I started to think about those incidents and I just curled up in bed and just started saying NO NO NO. Ever since then life has been a struggle for me, but I think I've somehow calmed myself down for the most part but I still struggle with it. Before that night I was having problems with finding girls attractive... I would go pleasure myself to a pic or porn and afterwards I would question if they were attractive. This episode has just made that even worse... And it seems like I'll never be able to be the sweetheart to girls and love them like I used to. Does this sound like HOCD?
This looks pretty much like a case of hocd. Do you casually get questions like "What if i was gay?" "What if i like the same sex?" "What if i was always gay?". Do get anxiety, depression and intrusive thoughts sometimes? Do you feel comfortable when thinking about this thoughts? How many hours a day you spend thinking about it? Did you stop doing some daily activities because of this? Problems when going to sleep? Excessive worry? How old are you? Do you fear about the possibility about being gay? Do you want to have a relationship with the opposite sex(getting married, having kids)? Do you feel the need to check on people of the same sex in order to see if you are really gay? Answer these questions please.
I tend to ask myself if guys are attractive and then that makes them seem attractive and I'll usually shake my head when that happens. I get depressed when I look at girls but I'll get anxious if I look at guys or just talking to them. I usually send to like to distance myself from guys. Yes, it does interfere with my hobbies and activities. I'm a huge sports person, and I can't play or watch them without excessive worry and anxiety. I'm 17 and I do wanna eventually have kids, but this year has just fogged my soft and loving side so I can't imagine getting married. I don't go out of my way to look at guys but at times when it's not on my mind I'll look at a guy and just think I'm fine but then the worry will start to pick up
Do you fear about the possibility of being gay?
Yeah, at times the fear is better/worse. I'd also like to add that I've been talking to a girl lately and she's told me that she's fallen for me. I feel bad for the girl...she lives across the U.S. from me but I still feel bad. I know that one year ago I would've fallen for this girl. She's a complete sweetheart but like every other girl ive talked to in the past year, I seem to see flaws in their appearance and doing that turns me off and question myself about what's going on
Ok, yeah, I'm sure this is a case of hocd.
How do I "cure" this? Does attraction to the opposite sex come back?