Homeless and mindless

i have created a situation for myself where i am unreliable and feel worthless, i have so many people in my life who care about me far more than i care about myself, i struggle, i try to please everyone and end up over extending myself, the main issue seems to be that there are so many of me and only one body, there are so many of me fighting for control and it is difficult to please everyone at once. Iva wants things her way, Ashdricky wants to run the program his way, number 3 is dark but feels nothing this of which i am envious. there is no room for Rob, it is a game of musical chairs that i play with myself, and rarely do i find a seat. but its all ok cuz i got me right where i want him

Envy is one of those 7 deadlys ya know, I'm a codependant it took me the past 5yrs. to slowly STOP saving the world so to speak & so I thought, and I just wore myself thin (shame on me), at least you are acknowledging it, thats the first step, one cant be everything to everyone huh. I'm proud of you for talking about it, keep going & talk when you feel like it & dont be so hard on yourself, I for one am glad your here.

Take care of you.

April

hi there

could i ask who all these people are, are they the ones u are trying to please or are they all u?

are u gettin some medical help for any of your problems?
counsuling or a docs imput?

keep posting and chatin hon

loving thoughts and positive vibes

those ppl are fictional character who i become depending on what drugs i take, they very so greatly in personality that i have given them names,crazy yes, but its almost like i dont want it to stop, when im rob i want to be Ashdricky when im him i want to be another. but thank you both very much you have helped :)

I can relate I know in my mind that I need to quit repeating the same stupid mistakes over and over and over and over!

sorry its taken me so long to get back to you but im finally here again.

so u are a bit like a method actor? instead of lines these are personas?

which one is the nicest?

as always

loving thoughts and positive vibes

PERFECT, way to go domestic, you have alot to teach, hope all are reading cause I sure am =D

lol

no it took me back years ago when we first lived on base in napples and i had to go to the local watering hole, i got out the car and pretended i was a visiting royal so it was shoulders back and chest out to enter, an overdone hip sway to get past the first few groups of people who were looking over the newcomers and then like a shrinking violet i hid in the darkest corner with legs crossed cos i was too shy to ask someone where the toilet was

arh youth

loving thoughts and positive vibes

A+b=C Actions + Beliefs= Consequences. Meaning what your thoughts and actions are can form your beliefs and contribute to consequences that are either good or bad. Depends on what you choose to have for your belief system. Your not worthless so don't think that. Everyone has those low moments, especially me at times. We can beat ourselves up or choose to "Make today the First Day of the REst of our life", and make it count for something positive. Start over when you feel you screwed up. Humans came with an eraser because we are all imperfect and its better to learn from your mistakes then it is to have never screwed up. Alot of successful people have lived by that code. Boundaries are good. Knowing how to value yourself and put yourself first is important. Knowing its okay to say NO and that loving yourself more and reminding yourself of that will help with setting boundaries and not biting off more than you can handle. It's better to be honest with yourself and toward others then it is to be a people pleaser. Those whom love you will always love you even if you say no you can't do that. Love yourself first.

Well done, keep sharing, your very insightful, take care of you.

April