My husband must be a pathological liar or a sociopath not sure but he has always lied. Its to the point that I can't believe one word he says. On top of this I am very sick with depression in bed all day and on new meds that is hard enough. He just stole $200 from my own mother he said of was an accident cause he had her credit card and pin # to get her food he said he used her card in the ATM instead of his that his card has the exact same pin # he must think I am stupid. I love him but I feel like its time to leave home the problem is I'm so sick with depression. Wouldnt that be best to leave help me.
I honestly believe that relationships are meant to be, if and only if they can withstand ALL the good and the BAD you have to offer. If you can't talk about it with your husband and come to an understanding, then is that going to be better or worse, in the long run for both of you? I don't know--separation is a HUGE thing... But I think, really--sometimes, things do change, and you have to do whatever feels right for you. [I don't know if it is acceptable to just "interject" anywhere on "anyones" 'voice' but...I just felt drawn to speak.]
I also had 14 grandparents at one point, so I am a product of multiple divorces and remarriages. It might make me biased.
But, it seems to me that Love is hard sometimes...
Sending you healing "good vibes"
Starlight, I am so sorry for what you are going through with your husband and depression. May I ask if your husband and marriage are causing your depression, or is for other reasons? As well, for me, a marriage should be built on trust and if you don't have trust, then you don't have anything. Of course you are so right not to trust his excuse of taking $200 from your mother, that's absolutely awful and speaks to his character. Why does he feel the need to lie so much and has he always been this way? As well, have you ever sought couples therapy? If there is any hope for your marriage, then it's worth working through, though if you've reached the end of your rope, then it's time to move on and to find happiness and peace for yourself.
I think alot of my depression is from him. I am just so sick of the lies its making me sick.is love worth that kind of constant hurt. I have bipolar so. With me my life has been unstable at times he is making it worse. I don't want to be a quieter but its just becoming to much. I wish someone could just tell me what to do I'm ready to go live in a motel and I think he would not benifit from therapy he thinks he is doing nothing wrong.
Starlight, I am so sorry that he is causing you so much distress. I think that relationships are work and worth the effort, but the good most certainly has to outweigh the bad. As well, it's a two-way street, meaning that both parties have to be willing to work on it. If you feel that you've done everything that you can do and if he doesn't think that he's doing anything wrong, then it's worth a possible separation until he comes around. Do you have family or friends that you can stay with now?
I decided to stay because I love him and at tis time of my life I'm so depressed I can't handle being alone and more stress of separation I am sick and to dependent on him. If I was strong I may feel different. Thank you for your support it helps so much really.
Starlight, I understand and respect your decision. Is there a possibility of trying couples counseling together so that you can make the best of your situation?
I really want to I have been talking to him about it and I need individual counciling also. Thank u so much for your support it means the world to me puppy lover u have been so nice to me I feel so alone and u have made me feel better.
Starlight, of course! I am here to "listen" and help in any way that I can. Please know that you are not alone, we are here for you. I know that you will get through this period of time with your husband, and have a stronger marriage on the other end of it. It's so important to not only work on ourselves individually, but together as well, that's why I believe that couple's therapy will be hugely beneficial to you.
:) I left him about 8 months ago. So happy now. Thanks.