My bf of 1 year has been lying to me this whole time

Yesterday, my bf told me that he has been living with his ex for 5 years, I knew something was wrong for a while and i had a gut feeling that my bf was hiding something.
after having a conversation with me he told me the whole situation about how he has been living with his ex. I felt so betrayed and hurt, and he acted asif there was nothing wrong and that i was overthinking for no reason which i still don’t know if i was.
and to make things worse , when i was about to forgive him, he told me about how he had been in a sexual relationship (and currently) with her ever since i was in a relationship with him, my heart dropped so fast and it felt like my whole world had just been crushed and destroyed.
i feel so terrible about this whole situation and frustrated. i’ve been trying to keep my mind of it but no matter what i do i always think of him and the realisation that he wasn’t who he said he was sinks deep into me.
i’ve never felt so much pain like this in my life, every time i have the slightest thought about what he did, my chest hurts and i start crying, i would really appreciate if anyone could give me advice :frowning:

This guy sounds like a real piece of garbage honey. I know that you had feelings for him, but any guy that would hide something like that from a person that they have been seeing for a year is trash. It sounds to me like this girl he is living with isn’t actually an “ex” if they are still sleeping together. Which means you are the side chick. Don’t you dare forgive him. Nobody deserves to be tricked like that.

Living with someone you aren’t in a relationship with is forgivable because you can say you are just roommates (that does happen), but sleeping with them means its more serous and that is something that he should have told you from the beginning. I am sorry that he did this to you. You deserve better.

I know its hard but try to think of this as a learning experience. A lot of men suck, hopefully now you will be able to spot the liars easier. On the bright side, its opening you up to better options.

@MagiaMoonlight thank you so much for the reply, i agree with you 100% that what he did is unforgivable, im slowly starting to realise that but it’s so hard. I’m trying to move on and forget about all this. again thank you very much for your help

Sounds like you need to drop him from your life. Magia Moonlight pretty much said it best i think

1 Heart

Get an STD test, some ice cream and chocolate, purge him and his stuff. Like all the others said, you deserve so much more.

1 Heart

You gotta get the hell away from this guy. Liars will destroy you if you let them… ask me how I know. Don’t waste your life letting him destroy your trust. It will make it hard to trust anyone if you let him keep lying to you. Finding out my ex was lying, cheating had me feeling lower than I knew was possible. Your not alone.

2 Hearts

I have realised now that there is no point in staying with him, im trying to get better and heal every day, thank you for your kind advice @SoloDad I appreciate that so much, I am so sorry that you had to go through this aswell :cry: we all deserve better.

2 Hearts

You absolutely deserve better. For a person to lie that long shows they never had any intention of letting you know. A decent guy would disclose even sharing a place with a female early on in the relationship, even if there was no physical or romantic aspect.

2 Hearts

How are you doing friend? Just wanted to check in on you.

Hey there, thank you for asking :smiley: i’m definitely doing a lot better than before i’m trying to focus on other things that make me happy but of course it is taking time , how are you?

Glad your doing much better!!!

1 Heart

How did things go, are you still together?

I broke up with him but i feel a bit bad because he was so sad about it

Kind of too bad, so sad moment.