My relationship anxiety is at an all time high. Constantly dealing with intrusive thoughts of my partner cheating or finding someone better than me. I struggle with finding connections to those I love and struggle to maintain it without wanting to run away and be alone. Therapy only helps so much and healing takes time. Figured support groups would be a nice start to building anonymous connections to help break the ugly vicious cycle of codependency- needing someone and not needing someone. Always wanting to fix everything and not knowing how to sit with my discomfort to heal without wanting to run away
Hugs and welcome. Has this fear built due to going through a relationship where your partner cheated?
@CKBlossom we had a rough beginning where he was cleaning up some previous relationship baggage and did some lying regarding that but it was before we lived together and before we were serious. So it definitely stems from him breaking trust but as far as the current moment, he has done his part in rebuilding that trust and being my partner and understanding that I do need to rebuild trust but for some reason I am having a hard time letting my guard down again. Completely normal feelings and working through them as a couple just wish finding connections weren’t so difficult.
@CKBlossom no just in general. Once someone hurts me I become very bitter over time and become very dependent on them and their feelings. I come from childhood trauma where My relationships were never stable so once I am triggered or hurt in some way I feel I shut down a bit. When In all reality, healthy conflict is normal in all types of relationships and my relationship has never been abusive or toxic. I guess what I meant is I struggle with allowing myself to connect after being disappointed or hurt. It’s really contradicting the way my mind works and it’s an ugly vicious cycle sometimes hard to explain via message board