The need to be alone


I recently received an autism diagnosis and an adhd diagnosis. I am currently in therapy working through things related to the diagnosis. One thing I have noticed about my life and as a child growing up is that I always tend to rather be alone. I am divorced and recently got out of a relationship and I really noticed that I rather be alone. I find with a relationship I am in this constant anxiety state. I can’t truly relax. It’s like I lose myself to this new “thing” that is actually the relationship. If we would hangout at my place, I didn’t feel at home in my own place. I didn’t feel at ease. When I am alone there isn’t any “expectations” placed on me and I don’t have to make sure I am giving enough attention to the other person. It’s like I only have so much energy to give and I have to give it to things like taking care of my self and being a dad to my son. I have to have alone time to recharge to have enough energy to do the things I absolutely need to do. Socializing and small talk has never ever been easy and it can physically exhaust me. Can anyone relate to me? Thank you!

I know several people like that including one of my children. It can be exhausting being around other people, I am extrovert and I get exhausted being around people too long. I think it is good to know that about yourself. How are you feeling about your diagnosis, your divorce, how is your son doing?

Thanks for your reply. I’m good with the divorce now. Took sometime to get through it. I am currently working through the diagnosis. I’ve been looking back at my life and realizing how some things make more since now knowing about the diagnosis. Life is a roller coaster ride. Just have flow with it I suppose. How are you?

I am doing well, did somethings yesterday like switching a doctor that is very anxiety inducing for me. I hate change, but I did it!

I think having a diagnosis, as scary as it is, is life changing, in a good way. It always you to have a path, recognize what is normal for you and find ways that are a healthy way forward, again for yourself.

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From Autism and Learning Disorders to ADHD