Why do I always have to be fine? Despite all the struggles that ADHD brings, it's always you'll be fine. It's not big deal. Meanwhile I feel like a clown trying to juggle and more balls keep being thrown faster and faster at me and I'm at a point where I can't keep up. So telling me I'll be fine, while an attempt to be uplifting, gets translated into yet another to do that I have to figure out how to fit in. I don't normally mind my quirks, but right now, as finals are crashing over me and I have the worlds least consistent teacher and a new prof who has no clue what he's doing and 6 finals (oh wait, I said that already), having to adjust my dorm room before quiet hours set in, even though it's currently set up perfect for me. I'm at a point where the air system in my room drives me crazy (it's loud). I have a room mate so I can't do my self medicating of listening to music and singing. I do take meds. but by this time they're out of my system and my brain feels like a hyperactive potato. I can't take more because then I can't sleep, not that I'm doing that well right now because of the noisy air system. Oh, and the climate control sucks too, it's either freezing or too hot in my room. I literally was asked yesterday how I was and my response was that's a good question and then proceeded to ask myself how I am. I have a 3 page paper for a final (topic to be assigned), a 6 to 8 page paper with 10 sources, an 11 page paper, a portfolio that's the rough equivalent of a 5 page paper and then two multiple choice tests. all but 2 of these assignments are due in the same 48 hour period. And I seriously feel like I'm forgetting something, but I write everything down so I can't figure out what it is. I want nothing more than to be fine, but it's really hard when juggling turns into dodge ball, yet you're still being expected to juggle
Hi @Bookwarm, you are not fine!!! There are the 2sides to Adhd, the “drunken fruit fly” and the “game on!”. Firstly, the noisy air system needs to be resolved because sleep is freakin’ important. Secondly, you in the perfect situation to get into the “game on” side of Adhd. The stress that is overwhelming you can also be the same stress that drives you and you will be on top of things looking for more to do.
There is a group called the flow Gnome project and if you look in to that (@ 1.5x playback speed) on YouTube, it may have the key to helping you get to “hold my beer” status.
But do get that air system sorted.
@TreborH It’s an old building, there isn’t anything they can do. Fortunately next year I will be in a newer building. Or if my meeting with the councilor can help push things through I’ll be in a single, which will give me more options for masking the sound or at least not having my bed under the air filter.
I know EXACTLY how you feel! being a good student is like all i care about yet i can't do it without f**king adderall... which i hate. and nobody understands why i have such a hard time with the simplest things like getting things done.
@taytay1313 I think I have to explain that better to my counselor next session. In our first session she was like take it on the weekends too (I normally let my brain do whatever because it needs it). That does nothing to help fix the I’m frustrated because I have to take this problem. If anything it made it worse. Especially with diagnosis on a rise, it would be super nice and helpful if the world maybe adjusted to fit us better, rather than force us to try to fit to them.
But you would be fine if people would accommodate you... It's all the NTs baby.
@EihCuat That’s the realization I keep coming to. If I literally got just a smidge more wiggle room in how I “should” function, everything would be fine. Just a smidge. Well, I say a smidge, if I sit here and list it’s probably more than a smidge. But even something as simple as a person giving me clear directions of their expectations, instead of updating it every time I see them (for a major project no less) can go a long way.